Sitemaps
How We Secretly Lose Control of Our Startups
Should Kids Follow in Our Founder Footsteps?
The Evolution of Entry Level Workers
Assume Everyone Will Leave in Year One
Stop Listening to Investors
Was Mortgaging My Life Worth it?
What's My Startup Worth in an Acquisition?
When Our Ambition is Our Enemy
Are Startups in a "Silent Recession"?
The 5 Types of Startup Funding
What Is Startup Funding?
Do Founders Deserve Their Profit?
Michelle Glauser on Diversity and Inclusion
The Utter STUPIDITY of "Risking it All"
Committees Are Where Progress Goes to Die
More Money (Really Means) More Problems
Why Most Founders Don't Get Rich
Investors will be Obsolete
Why is a Founder so Hard to Replace?
We Can't Grow by Saying "No"
Do People Really Want Me to Succeed?
Is the Problem the Player or the Coach?
Will Investors Bail Me Out?
The Value of Actually Getting Paid
Why do Founders Suck at Asking for Help?
Wait a Minute before Giving Away Equity
You Only Think You Work Hard
SMALL is the New Big — Embracing Efficiency in the Age of AI
The 9 Best Growth Agencies for Startups
This is BOOTSTRAPPED — 3 Strategies to Build Your Startup Without Funding
Never Share Your Net Worth
A Steady Hand in the Middle of the Storm
Risk it All vs Steady Paycheck
How About a Startup that Just Makes Money?
How to Recruit a Rockstar Advisor
Why Having Zero Experience is a Huge Asset
My Competitor Got Funded — Am I Screwed?
The Hidden Treasure of Failed Startups
If It Makes Money, It Makes Sense
Why do VCs Keep Giving Failed Founders Money?
$10K Per Month isn't Just Revenue — It's Life Support
The Ridiculous Spectrum of Investor Feedback
Startup CEOs Aren't Really CEOs
Series A, B, C, D, and E Funding: How It Works
Best Pitch Decks Ever: The Most Successful Fundraising Pitches You Need to Know
When to Raise Funds
Why Aren't Investors Responding to Me?
Should I Regret Not Raising Capital?
Unemployment Cases — Why I LOOOOOVE To Win Them So Much.
How Much to Pay Yourself
Heat-Seeking Missile: WePay’s Journey to Product-Market Fit — Interview with Rich Aberman, Co-Founder of Wepay
The R&D technique for startups: Rip off & Duplicate
Why Some Startups Win.
Chapter #1: First Steps To Validate Your Business Idea
Product Users, Not Ideas, Will Determine Your Startup’s Fate
Drop Your Free Tier
Your Advisors Are Probably Wrong
Growth Isn't Always Good
How to Shut Down Gracefully
How Does My Startup Get Acquired?
Can Entrepreneurship Be Taught?
How to Pick the Wrong Co-Founder
Staying Small While Going Big
Investors are NOT on Our Side of the Table
Who am I Really Competing Against?
Why Can't Founders Replace Themselves?
Actually, We Have Plenty of Time
Quitting vs Letting Go
How Startups Actually Get Bought
What if I'm Building the Wrong Product?
Are Founders Driven by Fear or Greed?
Why I'm Either Working or Feeling Guilty
Startup Financial Assumptions
Why Every Kid Should be a Startup Founder
We Only Have to be Right Once
If a Startup Sinks, Founders Go Down With it
Founder Success: We Need a Strict Definition of Personal Success
Is Quiet Quitting a Problem at Startup Companies?
Founder Exits are Hard Work and Good Fortune, Not "Good Luck"
Finalizing Startup Projections
All Founders are Beloved In Good Times
Our Startup Culture of Entitlement
The Bullshit Case for Raising Capital
How do We Manage Our Founder Flaws?
What If my plan for retirement is "never retire"?
Startup Failure is just One Chapter in Founder Life
6 Similarities between Startup Founders and Pro Athletes
All Founders Make Bad Decisions — and That's OK
Startup Board Negotiations: How do I tell the board I need a new deal?
Founder Sacrifice — At What Point Have I Gone Too Far?
Youth Entrepreneurship: Can Middle Schoolers be Founders?
Living the Founder Legend Isn't so Fun
Why Do VC Funded Startups Love "Fake Growth?"
How Should I Share My Wealth with Family?
How Many Deaths Can a Startup Survive?
This is Probably Your Last Success
Why Do We Still Have Full-Time Employees?
The Case Against Full Transparency
Should I Feel Guilty for Failing?
Always Take Money off the Table

Kim Malone Scott Explains How to Give Feedback

The Startups Team

Kim Malone Scott Explains How to Give Feedback

Kim Malone Scott pulls from her years of experience with such notable companies as Apple, Google, Twitter and Dropbox to enlighten us with her unique take on successful management of a team.

If you have the time, check out the video below to hear her great anecdotes firsthand. But if you can’t watch it now, read our summary to learn how to deliver great feedback that will help your employees grow and improve.

feedback

It can be tempting to think there’s a proven formula for giving feedback, but Kim asserts that no such formula exists. However she’s of the mind that there are two absolutes.

First, authenticity is paramount. The popular “feedback sandwich” often backfires because you’re actually focused on the negative, so the feedback recipient can see through the insincere flattery, and you lost trust and respect.

“You have to do it in a way that works for you, in a way that feels sincere. You have to believe in the truth of what you’re saying.”

Secondly, clarity is crucial. Kim explains that you need to “measure understanding and clarity not at your mouth, but at the other person’s mind.” If you feel yourself waffling or being unclear, you aren’t doing your job as a manager. It’s more important to be clear than to protect your employee’s feelings.

It’s also very important that you be specific when giving feedback; show, don’t tell. If you aren’t, people may jump to conclusions that aren’t at all in the spirit of what you were saying. For example, if you tell someone they were rude, they might think that they shouldn’t speak their mind anymore—which is of course not at all what you intended. Instead, give them specific examples of their rude behavior and show them the consequences of their rude behavior. By talking to them about how those conversations could’ve gone differently, you’re encouraging them to be more thoughtful about how they speak and to remain engaged.

Kim wasn’t born with an innate talent for giving incredible feedback. She shares a story from her days as co-founder and CEO of Juice Software to illustrate just how far she’s come. An employee had such a negative M.O. that when they entered a room you could feel the atmosphere change. Despite this, no one was willing to confront them, even as the situation grew more and more toxic. When it came time for Kim to fire them, they didn’t even realize they were being fired, because they were so completely unaware that there was an issue. Once they realized what was happening, they asked, “Why didn’t anyone tell me?”

This incredibly uncomfortable moment made Kim realize that, in an effort to be “nice” to this person, she hadn’t been kind at all — it would’ve been much kinder to have given them feedback all along, so they had opportunities to fix the problems that eventually led to them getting let go from the company. In fact, Kim has come to believe that giving “impromptu feedback is the most important thing you can do as a manager.”

That said, it can be really hard to just come out and say it, especially when the feedback feels more personal than professional. Here’s a funny little trick Kim uses: before a meeting, she’ll write down what she needs to say on a to do list. That way she’ll feel embarrassed if she doesn’t just get it over and done with. Plus, here’s something to consider next time you’re wondering if you should just keep your mouth shut:

“Every time I’ve had to give somebody feedback and I felt afraid I would offend them, they’ve wound up being grateful. Literally every single time.”

Yet “cruel empathy” is one of the biggest, most common mistakes managers make, according to Kim. Cruel empathy is when you avoid giving feedback because you’re trying to spare someone’s feelings—but in the end, you’re actually setting them up for failure and getting fired down the road. As a manager, it’s your responsibility not to be “nice,” but to be kind.


This is just the 1st in a series of 10 videos Kim Malone Scott created with us. To learn more about managing a team, check out the rest of the videos!

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