My child has self-confidence issues and doesn't always believe her first answer is right, although it is most of the time. How do I help her?

she has communication issues. She is so smart, 95% for the state on testing. High school.



What a great question.

One of my favorite coaching topics is overcoming insecurities. It is a favorite because the results are exponentially rewarding!

Not knowing the particulars limit my responses; therefore, broad-strokes answer is as follows:

Fundamentally, the underlying cause of your daughter’s inhibitions should be addressed because intellect is not necessarily synonymous with self-portrait.

I am not suggesting that your daughter should be psychoanalyzed; I am suggesting that it may take more than (positive reinforcement) to help your daughter communicate more effectively, which is a powerful tool in defining oneself, subsequently creating confidence that results in a more assured person even when that person’s thought, act, or response is incorrect. The confidence is derived from the process of doing the task to the best of one’s ability and having satisfaction in knowing that one has exhausted due diligence for the outcome.

With the proper exercises, this type of insecurity is easily resolved.

I hope this broad-strokes response provided some clarity for your daughter and you. “How to Communicate Effectively,” is one of my top skills-set. You may send me a message or call if you believe I may be of assistance. Regardless, I hope continued academic success for your daughter and a lasting positive resolution in her self-confidence. (smile)

Answered 7 days ago

Hi there,

As a former child myself (and still learning to be an adult :-) ), I used to have this same issue. Without more detail, it is very difficult for us to say how we can help your child with her communication issues/self-confidence issue.

Is your child currently living in a perfectionist environment? She might feel the pressure to always get the right answer on her first try/attempt. In this regard, it is imperative to let her know that most people are not "right" in their first few attempts in doing ANYTHING. Even revolutionary business leaders/public figures like Elon Musk, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Larry Ellison, Michael Jordan, Stephen Curry, Tom Brady, among others make mistakes and then ITERATE on those mistakes to get the solution.

My advice would be to ask her a couple of thoughtful, pointed questions to get to the root cause of her self-doubt and, ultimately, let her know that it is perfectly okay to be wrong. No one has the answers all the time and we will definitely face problems as we go through life (some problems don't even have solutions, and we have to be okay with it). The key is to learn from our mistakes so that we minimize the possibility of repeating these same mistakes.

Happy to jump on a quick call to offer my guidance on which questions you can ask and achieve your desired outcome.


Answered 5 days ago

Unlock Startups Unlimited

Access 20,000+ Startup Experts, 650+ masterclass videos, 1,000+ in-depth guides, and all the software tools you need to launch and grow quickly.

Already a member? Sign in

Copyright © 2020 LLC. All rights reserved.